Monkey Business Institute

Hello out there!

I am discovering that having a sense of humor is handy at middle age.  Ah who am I kidding?  Unless I plan on living well into my 90s, middle age is behind me and I am gleefully sledding downhill.

What's next?  A re-release of Born to Run for the rapidly aging?  With lyrics like “Tramps Like Us Baby We Were Born to Mall Walk?  or "Born to Move Slowly on the Ice?"  ARGH.  Now some of you younger folks may need some of the content in the above paragraphs translated:  

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  • Middle Age - anything age over 36 since average lifespan is 72 – though by definition it’s the age group between 40 and 60.  Come on, who lives to 120??
  • Bruce Springsteen - Best musician in the history of American music.  If you don’t know who he is I weep for you.
  • AARP - American Association for Retired Persons.  A lobbying organization that sends out periodicals to every person over age 50 - NOTE:  I am not yet 50.  NOTE:  Again, I am not yet 50.
  • Bone Phones – A radio that's shaped kind of like a rectangular snake that you would drape over your shoulders.  The bones of the shoulder and neck were said to help in acoustics.  I went through two pair.
  • Born to Run – released August 25, 1975 when I was a lovely, albeit naive child in Superior, WI.  I hadn’t heard music until I heard this album – except a brief flirtation with Led Zeppelin and  - um – embarrassed here – Barry Manilow.
  • Walkman – a battery operated cassette* tape player, about the size of a small toaster.  If you carried it upright and didn’t shake it very much, you could hear decent music through the headphones*.
  • Cassette - A plastic case that would fit into a cassette payer.  It contained a magnetic tape that could be recorded on, or ripped out with a pencil if you were angry.
  • Headphones – primitive versions of ear buds.
  • Tunnel of Love – released in 1987.  This album speaks of the pain of relationships and divorce.  Bruce’s melting lyrics in “All that Heaven Will Allow” was just the ticket for a young drama queen.  Still works for me.
  • Mall Walking – an activity common in older people.  Walking around an indoor shopping mall for exercise.  Indoor shopping malls provide a safe climate controlled walking environment - much like Florida.

 That's it for now friends!  It's time for my Geritol martini.